A good relationship is a healthy one. We often think of work relationships as completely different from those in our personal lives. However, aside from differing amounts of physical and emotional intimacy, the fundamentals of any healthy relationship are the same.

Healthy relationships are not perfect, as humans are not perfect. Healthy relationships will still endure disagreements, conflict, and hard times. It all comes down to communication, respect, and repair work.

Let's take a moment to reflect on what fosters psychological and physical safety in any relationship and adapt that to the workplace (Centre for Creative Leadership, 2025).

Our Values Come to Work With Us

Our personal values come into play in every significant interaction. Dialectical behavioural therapy discusses this (The Counselling Centre, 2024). One of your values might be being kind, and another might be being assertive with your message and mission.

Individuals can hold multiple values simultaneously. We can instil different values in our communication (there is a middle path). Embracing this complexity allows for more nuanced workplace interactions, moving beyond black-and-white thinking.

What Does Psychological Safety Create?

Psychological safety in the workplace means that each person, while being professional (respectful and aware), also feels that they can be themselves. This means staff members are given forums to voice their feelings, validate them, and discuss them.

As a manager, encouraging your staff to come and speak with you about their concerns is valuable. You might not be able to ‘fix’ the issues at play, but legitimately, being a listening ear and providing some validation goes a long way. You can still express limitations on what you can do to help, but sometimes (often) people just want to feel heard. It’s easy to become defensive when a staff member is emotional, especially if you think it's directed at you. But if someone knows that you will listen and not be reactive, they then feel safe to speak up.

Physical Safety Comes From Psychological Safety

In a previous workplace, I persisted in giving a client medication. The client had a mental health order in place from the court, a history of assaulting staff, and she disliked women. The client refused the medication, went into her room, and slammed the door. This client's room was at the end of a corridor. My gut feeling was to stop what I was doing because the client didn’t want a bar of me, and I was in danger.

However, management's directive was clear: "Just persist; eventually, they will relent." Trusting their guidance, I proceeded, only to be assaulted.

When I reported the incident, the manager offered time off or counselling. I declined but requested an alert on the client's file and a team agreement: if the client refused medication, we would cease attempts and follow the next steps in the mental health order. Management responded, "I'd rather leave this to the discretion of the Nurse" (the team leader was not a Nurse) and added, "It's important that we don't break patient rapport." I left the team shortly after.

This wasn't an isolated incident. On multiple occasions, my concerns about potential aggression or self-harm were dismissed, leading to preventable harm.

We do need to be conservative with risk. To ensure physical and psychological safety, this culture needs to be instilled from the top down (McGowan, Wojahn & Nicolini, 2023).

Empowering Staff Through Engagement

I once had a manager who had us all allocated to different leadership positions on top of our existing roles, e.g. fire warden, NDIS champion, perinatal mental health champion, and first aid officer. Although we never asked for this and were sometimes allocated to these roles when we were out of the office for the day (well played), it worked well. We all had a unique and individual role contributing to the team. Each person had their badge of honour and specialised skill set. The work was not onerous but manageable and built up each person's confidence.

When I was an undergraduate nurse in the emergency department, a nursing facilitator told me, ‘See where there are gaps and try to be the person to fill them.’ Therefore, if a staff member mentions something that could be of value to the team, see if there is a way that they could take the reins in supporting this.

Sharing the Load

In many workplaces, I would show my enthusiasm by organising a cake, gift and card for each staff member's birthday. When the teams were massive, we would make a birthday cake/arvo tea for everyone who had a birthday in January, for example (if they wanted to share their birthday date).

Several managers and team members suggested I could be the ‘social club person’. I was happy with this suggestion, so we worked out a solid plan as a team. Each person (voluntarily) donated to the social club kitty each year, and I would communicate and document what was spent and for what. It meant we could also have celebrations and commemorations for people who had a significant event in their life outside of a birthday. For example, staff members who got engaged or had a sick family member, partner, or pet who passed away.

We all have different skill sets and ways to contribute. Empowering your staff with leadership positions empowers them and also relieves the manager of some of the burden!

Having Your Staff Feel Valued

Everyone wants to feel valued. While some organisations use monthly awards, these can feel tokenistic.

We introduced a peer-nominated 'Employee of the Month' program in one team. Nominations, often highlighting acts of kindness or humour, were placed in a box. The selected individual received a rotating plastic trophy, and all nominations were read aloud, celebrating everyone's contributions.​

If revisiting this initiative, I'd consider a 'Secret Santa'-style approach, ensuring each staff member receives a nomination and preventing anyone from feeling overlooked.​

Genuine appreciation doesn't require grand gestures. Simple acknowledgments are often just as practical and sincere.

Some practical ways of showing you appreciate someone are by being flexible, where you can help them and trust them. Verbal thank you’s don’t need to be formalised through an awards ceremony. ‘Thank you for doing this today, thank you for being who you are, thank you for caring’ goes a long way for your staff member.

Avoiding a Punitive Environment

Psychological safety results in physical safety because staff feel comfortable reporting risks. However, if staff fear repercussions, underreporting becomes a concern (Farokhzadian, Dehghan Nayeri & Borhani, 2018).

I remember in an old workplace in a community team, whenever an admin staff member found any damage on one of the community cars, it would feel like we were all back in primary school, being outed publicly for not doing our homework. The admin manager would come in, not greet anyone and say, ‘Vehicle XYZ has scratch marks on the bumper, but no one has reported it.’ Can you imagine who would have put their hand up and said, ‘Sorry, ma'am, it was me.’

There was a reason why people felt too afraid to speak up. Could anyone besides me understand what a hassle it was for the admin staff to manage damages to the cars for insurance? I never knew because no one educated me about it. So, please educate your staff and remind them why it’s important to report risks and mistakes while assuring them that they won’t be publicly humiliated while doing so.

I had a wise Nurse from Ausmed (Zoe Youl) say, ‘Staff need to feel that they can speak openly, learn from mistakes, and give and receive feedback freely. Creating a culture and practices where this is supported and how that impacts actual care.’ That's too right, sister. Let’s leave it there.

References

• A Guide to DBT (2024)
• How Leaders Can Build Psychological Safety at Work (2024).
• Risk Management Event Evaluation and Responsibilities (McGowan, Wojah & Nicolini, 2023).
• The long way ahead to achieve an effective patient safety culture: challenges perceived by nurses (Farokhzadian, Nayeri & Borhani, 2018)

Author

Rasa Kabaila 

Rasa Kabaila is a Nurse Practitioner specialising in mental health and the founder of Broadleaf HNP Services. Her approach is innovative, holistic, individualised, and evidence-based, with a strong focus on recovery-oriented care. Deeply empathetic and passionate about helping others, Rasa began her healthcare career as a personal care worker at just sixteen.

She has successfully implemented research-backed clinical therapies for optimising the treatment of anxiety and depression, including pet therapy. Beyond her clinical work, Rasa has volunteered on nursing expeditions overseas and completed Ashtanga Yoga training in Mysore, India.

Rasa is also a Conjoint Lecturer with UNSW Rural Medical School and has been an academic tutor for undergraduate nurses and paramedics at the Australian Catholic University and the University of Canberra.

Her first book, Put Some Concrete in Your Breakfast: Tales from Contemporary Nursing, was published by Springer Nature in March 2023 and has since been read by over 17,000 readers. It has also been widely promoted across journals, magazines, and news channels.

For more about Rasa’s work, visit her practice website at Broadleaf HNP Services or explore her book, Put Some Concrete in Your Breakfast: Tales from Contemporary Nursing, featured on ABC News, available on Amazon and Goodreads.